New Life

Bible (Photo credit: Sean MacEntee)

I was born to a family which religion was the legacy. My mother was once a devotee of the Lady of Lourdes. I used to look up to her devotion to the faith and vowed that I would be in her footsteps someday. I was trained to lead the Rosary as early as I could remember. My sister and I never failed to join the yearly “Flores de Mayo” where little girls offer flowers to Mary. When I was in my 5^th grade I became one of the youngest members of the Legion of Mary for that batch. Sunday mass was something that I eagerly looked forward to. However, despite all those activities and devotions I always had the feeling that something was not right. The confusion whether God was pleased with me or not, or if I was truly a good girl to meet God in heaven were the questions that kept ringing in my head. I was not sure of the things I thought were good and every time I did something wrong guilt would grip me. Fear was the dominant emotion I had in those days. I could vividly remember one night when I just cried and cried silently for no apparent reason. There was a deep hunger inside of me despite the supposedly normal life I had with my family, intact and faithfully going to church every Sunday. As I was growing up physically and mentally the turmoil and confusion within were also growing until one day I lost interest in the religious activities I was so accustomed to do. I stopped going to church. I was rebelling inside and anger was eating me up.

During the intervening years something happened to my mother. I saw her read the Bible which she never attempted to before as far as I could remember. She had changed. She lost interest in the religious things she usually did. She was telling us something I didn’t understand. I knew she was attending a Bible Study in school where she was a teacher, but I did not suspect that that was the reason for the changes I saw in her. One day she vouched the idea of inviting the Pastor who happened to be her relative, to conduct Bible study in our home. Meanwhile, the vacuum in me persistently paved its way to put me in the dark. This time it seemed very deep perhaps because of the increasing guilt I felt since as a family we no longer go to church regularly; and I personally never felt like going anymore. But one night as I was struggling emotionally God touched me in a very special way through the song that I so often heard my mother sang. I found myself crying while singing in my heart over and over, absorbing the lyrics for the first time the song that says:

If you want joy, real joy, wonderful joy

Let Jesus come into your heart.

Your sins He’ll wash away;

Your night He’ll turn to day;

Your life He turneth over anew.

If you want peace, real peace, wonderful peace

Let Jesus come into your heart.

Your sins He’ll wash away;

Your night He’ll turn to day;

Your life He turneth over anew.

If you want love, real love, wonderful love

Let Jesus come into your heart.

Your sins He’ll wash away;

Your night He’ll turn to day;

Your life He turneth over anew.

I slept soundly although I did not fully realize what transpired in me at that moment. Then the day came when I understood what God did in my heart. On August 8, 1981 during the Bible Study, my family and I surrendered our lives to God. We all received Jesus Christ as our Savior and Lord. Then on September 13, 1981, just two days before my birthday, we all had our water baptism. That was the best and most wonderful birthday gift God has given me- NEW and ETERNAL LIFE.

 To God be the glory!

Cynthia