Lesson Learned

 I met a sister in Christ yesterday during a small group meeting (there were only 4 of us). As I haven’t been in Church for a while, hibernating for personal reasons, the two younger ladies and I met for the first time. One is in a very difficult moment in her life. Though her story is different, I could well identify with her as I went through similar instances in my Christian journey. I say instances because I realized that I went through different heartbreaking situations three times in the past. It is in the third experience that I learned my lesson and became who I am now in Christ.

To suffer from feelings of rejection and abandonment with the nagging feelings of guilt and condemnation is never easy. As I spoke to the younger woman who listened intently, I could see her eyes on the verge of tears every time a word hit home. I could see myself in her. I was in her shoes and so I knew what it felt like when someone spoke a word of hope no matter how simple. I remember well how a brother’s pat on my back with a simple, “How are you?” actually brought me to tears. That was over two decades ago and yet I could never forget it.

Wish I could say that after the experience I became wiser and stronger. Unfortunately, no, because if I did, then I would not have fallen into another heartache which became my worst nightmare. But praise God, I finally learned my lesson.

As I was giving advice to the young lady through text messages, I could see myself again trying to hold to the people whom the Lord brought to me to comfort me. I remember hanging on to those handful of brethren which made me feel ashamed for bothering them with my almost never-ending pity party; and this is what this young lady was telling me in her response. This then reminded me how I actually turned around to start my journey to healing. It was one simple step but looking back, that was the most significant step I made that brought me to where I am now.

I remember around 9 years ago telling the brothers and sisters who went their way to meet me for the nth time just to listen to me, that I’ve had enough; that I no longer want the devil to have his way and I didn’t want to be in the defensive anymore; that I would rise up in the Lord and face him squarely and turn the table against him.

The fight was long and hard like taking two steps forward and one step backward, but by His grace, I kept on. The issue didn’t change overnight, nor in a week or a month or even a year after, and not even today. But I have won because I have come to know and learned to fully trust the One who loves me and died for me that I am not anymore easily moved by whatever happens around me regardless of who accepts or rejects me. I found myself and value in Christ.

While the Lord truly uses people to help us through the difficult times (and He didn’t stop sending friends my way), and I am forever grateful to everyone who each played a role in the course of my healing, it is still Yahweh who ultimately delivered me from the pit.

The lesson I learned is summed up in this thought which the Lord gave me three days ago. I didn’t realize the value of the statement then when I posted it on FB but now I know.

Don’t depend on anyone for no one is absolutely dependable; don’t look for happiness in someone for everyone is bound to fail you in the long run. Stand on your own feet but make sure you are standing on the unshakable Rock, Jesus Christ, Yeshua HaMashiach, the eternally reliable, dependable and trustworthy God and Lord. He alone can hold you and lead you securely unto eternity.

Jeremiah 17:5-8

Image result for tree by the river

Google Image

Thus says the Lord:

“Cursed is the man who trusts in man
And makes flesh his strength,
Whose heart departs from the Lord.
For he shall be like a shrub in the desert,
And shall not see when good comes,
But shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness,
In a salt land which is not inhabited.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose hope is the Lord.
For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,
Which spreads out its roots by the river,
And will not fear when heat comes;
But its leaf will be green,
And will not be anxious in the year of drought,
Nor will cease from yielding fruit.

Love and blessings in Yeshua,

Cynthia 

Advertisements

A Testimony of Healing

NEW DESTINATION! CEBU-ORMOC!Now offering a new destination Cebu-Ormoc. Trips available 4x daily!Get Tickets

Ocean Jet

It was 7:09 in the morning today, Philippines time, that I was on board the Ocean Jet, seated beside my 72-year old mother. We were on our way to Cebu from Tagbilaran to apply for a passport for her. It’s her long time dream to travel overseas and this trip to Singapore is the first time. Yahweh is great for giving Mama not only the opportunity to travel abroad but also for the privilege of witnessing my brother’s first solo exhibit outside of the country come September this year.

We went to Cebu last Monday but the passport application was unsuccessful because of some lacking documents. Yesterday, the last important document that we were waiting for was finally delivered, just in time for today, Friday, the last working day of the week.

I was praying for the document to arrive because had it not been delivered on time, I cannot anymore accompany Mama since my kids and I will be leaving for Dumaguete on Sunday, ending our month-long vacation in Bohol. And Yahweh willing, we will be flying back to Manila towards the end of the month in time for the opening of classes for this school year 2017-2018.

Yesterday, everything was set and we were ready for the trip this morning. Mama went to bed early while I finished my laundry. I went to bed around 10 o’clock but Mama was up again, said she was hungry. She had tea and a piece of pancake which my daughter prepared for her. I was already falling asleep when she said that her blood pressure was slightly high. I didn’t mind as I thought it would normalize in a few minutes. Moments later I heard her calling my nephew to wake up as she might need a trip to the hospital because her blood pressure kept going up even after taking her medicine. I got up, found her sitting on her bed already feeling bad and getting pale. I took her hands; they were very cold even after the aircon was off. I held them tight while praying. I rubbed and massaged her cold feet as well with liniment. She took another reading of her blood pressure. It went down from 180/100 to 160/100, still above normal.

Some minutes later Mama was still not relieved. It was 12:00 midnight. While observing her, I kept praying and asking the Lord if He would hear me and heal her. Papa was already up and by his looks, I knew he was very concerned. He rubbed Mama’s hands and back. Her breath was short and rapid as along with the high blood pressure she was also complaining of heartburn. She wanted to see the doctor. I had to make up my mind and obey the prompting of the Holy Spirit to pray once again, to take authority and to rebuke everything that’s attacking her, otherwise, the hospital trip would ensue that could likely lead to the cancellation of the trip to Cebu in the morning.

I sat down in front of her on the bed. Holding both her hands I praised and thanked the Lord for listening and answering my prayer. I heard both Papa and Mama agreeing with me as I prayed by the leading of the Spirit. The prayer lasted about 10 minutes which I ended by reciting Psalm 23.

I told my parents that it’s okay to go back to sleep as everything would be alright. Mama checked her blood pressure right after our prayer. It read 133/100. Praise Yahweh God! Mama exclaimed, “The power of prayer!” I answered, “The power of God because He is real!”

Mama was observing herself for a little while. I heard her told Papa softly that if she won’t feel total relief, they would go to the hospital. I stood in the gap quietly and as the Lord led, I prayed in the Spirit. Finally, I saw her relaxed. She removed the pile of pillows she used to lean on and slept normally. I could hear Papa softly snoring. They were both asleep. I went back to bed praising Yahweh for another miracle. I looked up the time and it read 1:30. I could not tell how long before I finally fell asleep but I didn’t really care because I was just happy and grateful watching both my parents sleeping soundly.

Mama woke up very early as usual. I woke up a quarter before 5:00 o’clock. My first question to her was, “Are we going to Cebu as planned?” She said, “Yes, because now I’m feeling fine, not sensing anything wrong!”

In two hours we got to our destination safe and sound. Since Mama is a senior citizen, she was privileged to not go through the long line and so was done in less than an hour. Before the day ended, we were already back here in Bohol. All through the day until this moment that she’s already asleep, my dear Mama has not complained of anything unusual.

Thank You, Father, for healing Mama and for the successful trip to Cebu earlier today. Thank you, for being our present help in times of need. Thank you that even if I do not always sense Your nearness, You truly are just a prayer away. Thank You, that once again You showed me that You are always with me and I can rest assured that when I pray, You listen and answer. Forgive me for the times I doubted about hearing Your voice. And thank you for not condemning me for being slow of understanding. Most of all, thank You for loving me unconditionally. I love You so much, my Father and my God!

Love in Yeshua,
Cynthia

Don’t Quit

During a very difficult time in 2010 I said to God in desperation that unless He intervened I would certainly quit. I said I would not do anything good or bad but definitely I would stop hoping and believing. I slept with a heavy heart because I meant everything I said and contemplated; because I felt truly hopeless and helpless. But as faithful and good as He is, He didn’t let go of me. He gave me a message in a very vivid dream.

In the dream I was down on the floor, no strength nor wish to get up. Then I heard a voice calling aloud, “Where are now those who are willing to stand in His name?; who will defend Him now?”

As I heard it I realized that everyone seemed to turn away, and I did not want to. I mustered all my will and stood on my feet; and raising my arms high I shouted on top of my voice, “JESUS IS LORD! JESUS IS LORD! JESUS IS MY LORD!”

Suddenly, two women turned and looked at me angrily. They raised their hands to slap me but they hit an invisible wall and hit it hard. In shock and amazement they walked away from me.

I woke up and cried as it dawned on me how foolish I was to tell God I was quitting. He showed me in the dream that I could not and really would not want to run away from Him. He also clearly showed me that those who wished me harm, those who wanted to see me fall would be disappointed for He is protecting me. He is my shield and those who will attack me will find themselves attacking and hitting Him instead. Hallelujah!!!

If you feel like quitting, thinking that God does not care or is not concerned about you and your situation, you are definitely wrong. He loves you more than you ever know. Hold on and wait upon the Lord for He is doing something good out of your troubles. He is molding you into the person that He wants you to be; that you will be perfectly fit for the calling that He has for you. The process is painful but when you come out of it, when you see yourself transformed in His expert hands you will certainly thank and praise Him that He let you go through the fire.

Psalm 91

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say[a] to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.”

For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
    and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his pinions,
    and under his wings you will find refuge;
    his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
You will not fear the terror of the night,
    nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
    nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
    ten thousand at your right hand,
    but it will not come near you.
You will only look with your eyes
    and see the recompense of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place—
    the Most High, who is my refuge[b]
10 no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
    no plague come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
    to guard you in all your ways.
12 On their hands they will bear you up,
    lest you strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread on the lion and the adder;
    the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.

14 “Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;
    I will protect him, because he knows my name.
15 When he calls to me, I will answer him;
    I will be with him in trouble;
    I will rescue him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
    and show him my salvation.”

Cynthia

A Quick Note and Testimony

It has been close to six months since the last time I published on this blog; and getting back is not easy. I lost my momentum although not the desire to write and share the things I learned from the Lord. Praise Yahweh for not giving up on me.

I want to thank all of you, brothers and sisters, who took the time to contact me through this blog or email and would like to ask your forgiveness for not giving you answers as I thought I would be able to write on this blog soon. But, obviously, it took me such a long time to sit down and write.

Anyway, I got sick last year and that’s the primary reason for my absence. It started off as  an unusual fatigue in the early part of June last year and gradually itensified as the days went by. Without detailing the symptoms, I was hospitalized in August and was diagnosed with Grave’s disease that caused hyperthyroidism. I was still sick when I posted the last article about the “Day of Prayer for the Peace of Jerusalem;” and praise the Lord, I was still able to attend and do my part in the event last October.

Although the medicines worked, I remained physically weak and didn’t regain the weight I lost which was about 10kgs because I would not take those medicines dutifully. In my last visit to the doctor over two months ago, he said that I would need to undergo radioactive iodine treatment to stop my thyroid from producing excessive iodine. He explained that it was safe though it meant causing the thyroid in the long run to stop working altogether thus creating the opposite situation of a hypo thyroid; safe in the sense that the lack of iodine is not harmful and can easily be supplemented compared to a hyper thyroid that could affect the other organs adversely when not treated. Both cases didn’t sound good to me and I thought I could pray and ask the Father to heal me.

Well, I returned to taking the prescribed medicine which was really effective. But as very typical of me, I rebelled against depending on pills to keep me in shape so I acted on my conviction that the Father could heal me. I went to the Lord in prayer, desperately asking Him to restore my thyroid to its normal function. Filled with the Spirit, my faith soared and by His leading I opened my Bible to see what He would tell me; and alas! I looked straight to the highlighted word in 2 Kings 20:5 that says, “… ‘I have heard your prayer and seen your tears and I will heal you.’…”

Yahweh gave me the word He gave Hezekiah after he desperately prayed for healing. I thanked and praised Him and told Him that I would just finish off the medicines for the next three days and won’t buy anymore but trust that He already healed me. From that day forward, about two months now, I never suffered from any symptom. I don’t look sick and feel sick anymore. I am physically normal and that’s all because of His faithfulness. Praise and glory to Yahweh!

I will end this note for now but will be back soon. Thank you for all your prayers and for remembering me during my absence. The Lord bless and keep you all.

Love in Yeshua,

Cynthia